How-to Adapt to Parenthood?

How-to Adapt to Parenthood?

Be hon­est to each other, and find time for each other and your­selves to derive the most out of being par­ents. Lis­ten to your part­ner, be sym­pa­thetic, sup­port your part­ner and resolve con­flicts immediately.

I think that being a con­scious par­ent opens your eyes to the fact that any adult rela­tion­ships that you have, when­ever chil­dren are present on a daily basis, that they’re mod­el­ing how they get along with peo­ple by what they see how you get along.” ~ Peter Krause

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Ensure that you’ve time for each other and your­selves to derive the most out of being par­ents. Ensure that your part­ner has time to relax and see friends with­out hav­ing to worry about the baby. Remem­ber that you’re still indi­vid­u­als in a lov­ing relationship.

Dis­cuss your feel­ings about the roles of men and women. Be pre­pared to have your views chal­lenged, but do not be dis­il­lu­sioned by dis­ap­pointed expec­ta­tions. Be pre­pared to make hard choices and make com­pro­mises wher­ever your views diverge.

Think about atti­tudes that may affect your part­ner. You’ll ben­e­fit by encour­ag­ing your part­ner to get involved and shar­ing the baby’s care. Encour­age your part­ner to unwind and spend time with the baby as a way of relax­ation. Bathing the baby, for exam­ple, is a good way to relax as well as care for the baby.

Talk to your part­ner about your feel­ings and learn how to express them. Avoid mis­un­der­stand­ings by being hon­est to each other. Remem­ber that sar­casm, accus­ing or belit­tling your part­ner will make mat­ters worse.

Resolve con­flicts imme­di­ately. Lis­ten to your part­ner, be sym­pa­thetic and sup­port your part­ner by shar­ing your ups and downs. Deter­mine the cause and agree on a solution.

Forego some indi­vid­ual plea­sures in the inter­est of the fam­ily. If your baby has kept you awake all night by cry­ing, for exam­ple, it’s okay to accept your feel­ings; but it’s abnor­mal to use violence.

Learn to cope with stress to min­i­mize dam­age to your rela­tion­ship. Take pride in being the care­giver. Focus on one thing at a time. Avoid bring­ing work home. Find ways to relax with each other and by your­self. Remem­ber that it’s nor­mal that a baby can bring to light dif­fer­ences that drive par­ents apart. It is for you to develop the new famil­ial rela­tion­ship with each other.

Ref­er­ences:

Stop­pard, M. (2006). First-Time Par­ents: What Every New Par­ent Needs to Know. Dor­ling Kinder­s­ley. New York, New York.


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Parenting